Nix Feldmiller Family Blog

Tuesday, June 21  I went to bed Tuesday night feeling pretty tired and worn down.  During the day I worked on putting some new lumber in the attic and that afternoon Esther was playing with Tuvy.  I went walking with Horace the dog to get some light training in for the weekend trip to Pete's that was planned.  I was feeling tired when I went to bed.  It felt like possibly some more than just a tiring day, but I didn't think much of it.  The thought slightly crossed my mind that I may have covid.   Wednesday, June 22 Then on Wednesday morning I woke up with a sore throat.  However, I went to breakfast at Hello Deli as usual and was ready to go to a handyman job for fixing some leaky sprinklers.  The job fell through due to rain so I went to Lowes instead.  I got home around 9:30 and felt OK.  Susie and I took Esther to swim lessons at noon and then she went to work.  I went walking at 1:00 when Mary was watching Esther....

 Today is the 16th anniversary of Ruthie passing.   I've reflected on her death before.  In fact, it took me a few nights to get through all of the memories surrounding her.  Though, there is probably more that I can recall and process through.   Today we heard from Ang, and Steve, and Ruth.  But, as far as me, that was all.  I imagine Susie heard from others. It's not her birthday.  It's like secondary to her birthday, but it's an important day for Susie and me.  It was just as hard as her birthday, maybe even harder, but it was different too.   I didn't hear from anyone in my family and I guess that is kind of a bummer.   Writing about her and thinking about her earlier this morning causes me to experience tension in my neck.  Why tension?  Shouldn't I be feeling sadness.  It's kinda weird.  I don't know where the tension is coming from.  Maybe it's something I can talk to Susie about....